television. Just ask Theodore “Theo-Dog” Legend. Once you’ve pissed on a fire
hydrant in front of the paparazzi, no one ever lets you forget it.
her dog training routine on a national talent show. Although she didn’t win
first prize, she snagged Theo’s attention and he’ll do just about anything to
make her his—even if it means being the butt of everyone’s joke once again.
nickname—pun intended. Pairing the two together on a new show sounds like a
disaster waiting to happen… or it could be the best thing that’s ever
happened to them.
cleaning later. I get weepy when I’m hanky.”
followed me to the kitchen.
portmanteau.” Walking over to the table, I removed the foil from the dish.
Steam billowed up, carrying the heavenly scent of apples and cinnamon with it.
what?” Sounding utterly confused, Theo went over to a small white coffee maker
next to the sink and punched a button. It sputtered for a few seconds before
the aroma filled the room.
mismatching mugs from the cabinet. Setting them down, he leaned back against
the counter while he waited for me to explain.
to make one,” I said. “Hungry and cranky equals hanky.”
that fits. I don’t get mad,” I clarified. “Just irritable.”
nickname, huh? Putting Theodore and dog together.”
that.” I grimaced because he obviously wasn’t a fan of the combination. “I’m
sure whoever came up with that thought they were being very clever.”
mighty humpy myself.” When he said the word ‘humpy’, I could’ve sworn I saw his
pelvis do a slight thrust.
that did funny things to my stomach. “Portmanteau. Hungry and grumpy. Humpy.”
inappropriate but also correct. I couldn’t knock him for coming up with his own
word, even if it did draw my attention to his groin.
myself to look away from his lower half, but it was really difficult.
wasn’t scrutinizing his living quarters, my thoughts went elsewhere: straight
to the gutter.
his pants stretched over his crotch, and he probably wasn’t wearing underwear
because I could see a very distinct outline of his dick.
stare at it, but it was just right there.
Out in the open. And alarmingly large. It was like spotting
a rare animal in the wild. The thing practically needed its own Australian
was when it came to actual sex, I wasn’t completely innocent. I knew what a
semi-erect penis looked like. The length of it rested against his thigh and the
definition of the thick head was impressive.
startled me, and my eyes snapped up to his.
fire. I’d been caught, and I wanted nothing more than to sink under the table
lowering myself into the chair.
the rough start to the day on low blood sugar. Deal?”
what I’d expected him to say, but it was a lot better than him calling me out
for eye-balling his junk.
responded. Then for my own benefit, I added the reminder, “I’m looking forward
to being coworkers and friends.”
arched on the word ‘friends.’
did see me checking him out after all.
sanity, I really hoped he was planning to wear jeans for the show. And maybe
some underwear with crotch-confining support. Like a girdle, but for penises.
cornfields. Although she no longer lives in the country, her dream is to return
to rural living someday. As a stay-at-home mom, she spends most of her days
running back and forth between her two wonderful kids and her laptop. She loves
her family, iced coffee, and happily-ever-afters.